Thanksgiving...bah humbug.

[artemis]

Part of the tradition is that my mom makes chicken and dumplings from scratch.

I would come for the chicken and dumplings alone! That's my birthday dinner.

 

[SaltedFig]

The bit that really was the "icing on the cake" of rudeness, was the pay-back hang-up call from BIL ... I mean, why do people think they have to play this power game on top of the original rudeness?

I hope these silly people don't ruin your lovely gathering.

And ... have a great thanksgiving!

 

[Ivanstein]

Ever notice family are the ones that treat you like crap?

Tell them to pound sand.

 

[scard]

OMG, are we related? (not really) I hope the inconsiderate behavior of your in- laws doesn't ruin your holiday. Have some wine or maybe some eggnog and a wonderful Thanksgiving!

 

[Zany_in_CO]

if someone called me telling me what am suppose to cook i would hang the phone

 

[Arimara]

Wow... I definitely would have told them point blank, not to bother coming over. That's incredibly rude and I am a picky eater. I won't eat raw tomatoes, mushrooms of any sort, figs, raspberries and anything that has more than a teaspoon of cumin in it. I also cannot eat pork (I can't digest it) and seafood of any sort (cannot digest this either). Luckily for my loved ones, I still don't eat a lot of food so I can load up on veggies and what not and be good.

 

[SunRiseArts]

Exactly what George said. I wish I could say it at loud.
Lots of people have become ridiculed entitled. My husband and I were saying that as we are now older, this Thanksgiving thing seems more like a chore.

Ever notice family are the ones that treat you like crap?

Tell them to pound sand.

Are you the orgameister soap maker on you tube? I love your videos.

 

[Relle]

Come to Australia, we don't have Thanksgiving, better still, tell them to come.

 

[cmzaha]

I am so glad my children and their children were not raised to be picky eaters. My girls learned as have my granddaughters ages 4 and 8 eat what is served or sit in the rattan chair facing the wall until my hubby and I are done eating. It never fails that they do not sit in the chair long and would come eat what is cooked for dinner. In turn my girls learned to eat a wide variety of foods, since I cooked many ethnic dishes and they always had to take at least 2 bites if they were at the table, in turn they have done the same with their girls. I refuse to be a short order cook, for anyone anytime. During my years of doing Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners I always recognized any dietary restrictions and will cook foods that would fit, but that's as far as I go. Sure never stopped anyone from coming to my house for dinner. My opinion with children is, when they are old enough to cook and pay for their own food they will eat what I serve. I would have told those extremely rude people to go visit the nearest buffet

Hope you have a good Thanksgiving regardless of rude family

 

[Kittish]

Yea, I'd have told them that they were entirely welcome to make other plans for Thanksgiving. I don't take that kind of treatment from anyone. Family is not some magic pass that makes any sort of abuse or horrible behavior acceptable.

 

[Stacyspy]

Once I put my foot down, I rarely change my mind. This will not be one of those rare times...lol... I have mac and cheese on the menu, as well as the kids being welcome to hot dogs ( I have a roller grill set up), chicken strips (fresh out of the fryer), and a number of sandwich meats.
This is also not the first time they've come to dinner, and nothing has been said before.
Thank you so much for your support. I also saved the wine for today
I'm feeling much better, and looking forward to having a house full!
Thank you again!

I think you absolutely said the right thing. While a host is supposed to provide a welcoming environment, the onerous also applies to the guest: you don't ask for unreasonable things.

She didn't offer to help clean or cook either, only to add more duties to your hostess list. Family or not - that's not appropriate guest behavior.

I bet you're feeling guilty, and are very tempted to give in. I can urge you not to, but that won't have any affect. It's ultimately up to you, but know that I am on your side. For a typical NON holiday meal, any professional with training in dealing with kids' food pickiness (occupational therapist, behaviorial therapist) will tell a parent to have one item at the meal the kid will eat. You have how many kids coming? You can't and shouldn't make different plates of food for them.
You might feel better though, if you have a box of mac n cheese, or pbj sandwich supplies in the house that the PARENT can access in order to feed their own picky child. HOWEVER, this is not required as being part of a good hostess!

Our 9 year old is picky so we've dealt with this a lot. It's different when they're 3 and a skipped meal will cause a screaming meltdown that affects the whole crowd. It's another when the child choose to not "eat around" the offending food and pick out what they will eat. Or go get a slice of cheese for apple from the fridge themselves.

I'm also going out on a limb here and suggest you don't have wine yet as a way to cope with this. Alcohol is a nervous system depressant. It will not help with the rest of the day.

Again, you have my support.

That's a sad story... I cannot imagine watching everyone else eating nummy chicken and dumplings...
PS.. This is the first year I have not had a "Christmas throw up tree"..we have a new kitten, so I have to go and get huge boxes of shatterproof ornaments, so everything matches and it's not near as fun.

Picky eater story:
20+ years ago (I'm not going to do that math, lol) we lived next door to a very nice couple with a daughter my age. They had what I call a department store Christmas tree - it has a very specific color theme. It's a fake tree with a specific set of ribbons and ornaments. Our tree is the opposite - a real tree with handmade and gifted ornaments, along with about 4 boxes of tinsel. It looks like Christmas threw up on our tree. So a tradition evolved where this family would join us for our tree decorating every year.

Part of the tradition is that my mom makes chicken and dumplings from scratch. The man of this couple didn't like chicken and dumplings so Mom started making him a Stouffer's lasagna. No extra trouble and we were close enough that we didn't mind.

One year, we had some extra company. A member of the neighbor's extended family had died and they'd had the funeral the day of the tree decorating, so we invited some of their out of town family over. Neighbor Husband told my mom that one of his relatives wouldn't like the chicken and dumplings either, so would mom mind making a 2nd stouffer's lasagna? No problem.

We all sit down to Mom's good china bowls filled with dumplings - this poor man is looking from his plastic tray of lasagna to the dumplings, clearly hurt. Well, Neighbor Wife explained to him what Neighbor Husband had done. We managed to spoon up a few little dumplings for this guy..sadly for him, the big fluffy ones were already gobbled up.

And you'd still find plenty to eat here
I did not tell them not to, but I don't think they will be attending...lol...they do not care for my "snotty New York" attitude...oh well, you can take the girl out of New York, but yeah...lol

Wow... I definitely would have told them point blank, not to bother coming over. That's incredibly rude and I am a picky eater. I won't eat raw tomatoes, mushrooms of any sort, figs, raspberries and anything that has more than a teaspoon of cumin in it. I also cannot eat pork (I can't digest it) and seafood of any sort (cannot digest this either). Luckily for my loved ones, I still don't eat a lot of food so I can load up on veggies and what not and be good.

I might, but I certainly would not make you deal with them...lol

Come to Australia, we don't have Thanksgiving, better still, tell them to come.

 

[Ivanstein]

Exactly what George said. I wish I could say it at loud.
Lots of people have become ridiculed entitled. My husband and I were saying that as we are now older, this Thanksgiving thing seems more like a chore.
Are you the orgameister soap maker on you tube? I love your videos.

Nope. Not me. I prefer not to publicize my (at times rather entertaining) ineptitude. [emoji16]

 

[Susie]

You know, I would have told them to bring food the kids would eat, or don't come. And I would not have been overly polite about it.

Have a happy Thanksgiving!

 

[SunRiseArts]

So how did things turn out op?

 

[Stacyspy]

So how did things turn out op?

I had a lovely day... they chose not attend, and there was only one rude comment on Facebook, which friends of mine who were here shut down quickly...lol...

Thanks for all the support, I appreciate it!!!

 

[Arimara]

I hear ya with the New York thing. Some of my co-workers found out real quick I'm the real deal. =p