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Seragilo

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Apr 24, 2013
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Hi There!

This may sound silly but does anyone else something I call Seller's Guilt? And if so...what do you do?

I have been making my own products for years...for myself and friends that is. I have always given it away, as gifts or just....you know, because. Last year I started looking into selling my products and have now opened up shop so to speak. My only problem, I still have this incredible urge to give things away to friends and family. I feel slightly guilty charging them for something I enjoy doing.

Is this odd? Do others have the problem.

Another thing though, some people still believe they should be getting my items for free because I gave them a small sample once...

Yes, I'm a wee conflicted, guess I am just wondering how others have handled the situation or how they feel.

Would be nice to know I'm not alone! :)

Thanks,
Seragilo
 
I have always had that problem, even when friends/family OFFER to pay. *sigh* I am a bad bad salesperson. Which is odd, because I am also a very gooood salesperson. Because I can sell just about anyone on just about anything, if I believe in it. It's just the actual exchanging of currency part that I hate. lol *sigh* I used to do computer service, I used to do graphic design, all of which involved face-to-face interaction etc, and they would become friends, and then I would hate to charge them.
 
I am the worst salesperson EVER! And it can feel weird to charge for something you love to do - or as in my particular case, not having the confidence to charge. BUT, once I bit that bullet, it was the most amazing feeling ever to get paid for what I love to do. And, a couple years into this venture, I am finally getting over the "guilt" and don't give the farm away anymore.

I use to feel guilty for charging what I knew was good, fair price and would then drop tons of extras into everyone's bags. Not anymore! Give it a try - for real. I guarentee you will feel so happy and thrilled when somebody comes BACK to pay you for your products again.
 
The only time I charge my family is if they are going to give the item to another person. I do charge some of our friends because they insist on paying.
 
I feel bad about charging my family and close friends as well but most of them have insisted on paying so that helps. The only ones I flat out refuse are my mom and my husband's grandmother. I also have some friends who have helped me quite a bit with the business- editing text, marketing, tax or business services and I want let them pay either. I kind of see that as a trade or barter for services so it works out.
 
Charging friends and family

I got around this by charging friends and family just my cost rounded up to even dollars. They all argue but this way they get a discount and but still feel they are paying something. And I often throw in extras anyway (good marketing even with regular sales)
 
I don't sell my soaps but I found myself in your same predicament when my cake making hobby turned into my business. I gave away cakes for a year to friends and family and sometimes even acquaintances. When I started charging it definitely was awkward at first, but I realized that it was costing ME money and time. I gently explained that to people and they understood that I just couldn't give them away for free anymore. Now, I give cakes to my very immediate family and my best friends(if they offer to pay costs, I accept) The rest of my family and friends get charged my cost or slightly over depending on the time.. The rest of the people get charged the regular price that's on my website.

Don't feel bad about charging. Making money will only further your passion and your ability to better your product.
 
I will have no trouble asking people I hardly know for money, but I won't be asking my family or close friends for payment. For not so close friends (or not so nice family!) I might ask for a favour at some point or maybe even money if they are asking for a lot of products and so on.
 
I have a nephew who refuses to accept free soap, he tells me this is my business and how I make money so he will pay for his products thank you very much. When he and his wife order it is usually a couple of hundred dollars worth. I still sneak in freebies though, he is after all my favourite nephew and always has been.... ;)
 
He truly is. The rest of the family just expects me to send whatever they want no matter how expensive a product it is to make and then gets mad when I tell them I have a family discount of 20% (I don't do that to all of the family just the demanding ones). My sister phoned me up with a list of what she wanted so I went over the pricing with her and said, well with your 20% discount it will only come to this amount. She started whining.... whatever. I love being able to gift my products to family but not accept demands...
 
I'm a hairdresser by trade, and when I had to start asking for payment, it was definitely awkward. People assume you do a business like this that it is just for fun. But you pay for the all the raw ingredients (in my case its color, back bar products and equipment), plus its your time and expertise. In my case, some people decided they didn't want to pay, which left open a spot for a new customer who did. I think friends and family discount is a very good way of doing it, then people will know not to take advantage.
 
Most of my family/friends have always insisted on paying me and in the early days it did feel awkward. But they insisted as it was how I made my living. We finally settled on them paying the wholesale price. I do however give away a lot of freebies when I have developed a new product or when I make a batch of something to photograph for a book etc.

I don't think it wrong to ask for some sort of payment even if it's just to cover the costs of manufacture.
 
He truly is. The rest of the family just expects me to send whatever they want no matter how expensive a product it is to make and then gets mad when I tell them I have a family discount of 20% ...


That's so rude. Of course as a friend or relative it's lovely to get freebies, but this is how you make your living! You can't expect that discount; you should be excited to receive it.

Bah. Hijack over. Carry on.
 
I'm having the same issue. I gave soap as gifts to close friends for Christmas and that was the first any of them even knew that I made soap, even though I've been making it for years for our own use. So now they all want to buy from me and I'm having a hard time charging then the same price I'd charge someone I don't know.
 
I'm having the same issue. I gave soap as gifts to close friends for Christmas and that was the first any of them even knew that I made soap, even though I've been making it for years for our own use. So now they all want to buy from me and I'm having a hard time charging then the same price I'd charge someone I don't know.

You don't need to charge good friends the same rate...maybe 1/2 price? Call it the "Friends Special/discount" or something along that line. That's if it's for personal use. If they are shopping for other people for gifts, maybe 20 - 25% off?
 
My husband taught me to charge the FULL price, then give a friends 'n family discount if I want. That way they know the real value of the products they're getting and know they're getting a deal. So I do 10% for friends 'n family I'm not super close to and 20% for those I am close to. My employees buy at 1/2 wholesale (essentially at cost). My mom and my 20-something stepson ... can have whatever they want whenever they want it and and pay with a hug.

When I get paid, I don't feel resentful doing the work, and I treat the order just like I would handle any other order. That is a very good thing, because I'm not tempted to get into "I'm not getting paid so this is going on the bottom of the pile" mode of thinking. Even so, it IS awkward sometimes, but I've mostly gotten over it.
 

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