# Saying no to a custom order customer



## bodybym (Aug 23, 2014)

I was contacted by someone who wanted me to make them custom soaps for their website, and was even willing to provide all the oils. Fine, no problem. I had lots of questions from our email exchanges and just got off the phone with them and did another flurry of email. 

I had to say no.

They want custom soaps for their website to sell, with very specific ideas in mind about what they want, colors, scents, layers, and for them to be organic. However, they want scents that you can't get organically (like almond and peach) and want to use powdered ingredients that tend to turn brown in soap (like powdered rose petals and ground lavender) - but they don't want brown soap. They want to be able to have their soaps certified as being organic, but want them to be bright and colorful (Them: "like the ones at Sumbody or Lush") but still organic. I don't work exclusively in organics, however I have played with natural colorants, and I know that it is hard to get the bright purples, blues and greens using only natural ingredients. 

When I explained that it was a result of the chemical process from the lye then this happened:

Them - "can't you just leave out the lye". 
Me - "No, you need lye to make soap. It is the mixing of lye with oils and/or fats that make soap"
Them - "I've seen people on Etsy and other places that say that their soap doesn't contain lye, so why do you have to use it?"
Me - "They may be using glycerin soap, which they bought the base from a supplier and then used it to create soaps. They didn't use lye to make their soaps, but the supplier had to"
Them - "but they say that their soaps are lye free"
Me - "Properly made soaps have no lye left in them after they cure, but you have to use lye to make soap, otherwise all you have are scented and colored fats and oils"
Them - "Could you try to make soap without the lye and see what happens"
Me - "It's just not possible. You can't make soap without lye or oils. If you leave one of them out then you don't have soap".
Them - "Maybe you don't know how to make soap if you can't make it without lye".


I then politely said that I don't believe that we would be good business partners as we seem to have a different vision of what the product should be, and that I wish them well in finding someone who will help them to make the soap that they want. 

Good luck to them.


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## jblaney (Aug 23, 2014)

Wow!  I commend you for your polite response in light of them suggesting you don't know how to make soap.   I hope when I have my business set up I will be able to keep my composure as you have done.   All I can say is they have a lot of nerve suggesting that and I would have suggested they don't know what they are talking about and maybe they should not sell soap on their site if they have no clue how it's made!


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## Jaccart789 (Aug 23, 2014)

All I can say is wow!!!!!


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## Dorymae (Aug 23, 2014)

I give you kudos for your very diplomatic response.  

I would have told her to go ask a chef to make a traditional wedding cake without using using any flour. Sure he could use a cake mix - but guess what - there is still flour in it.  I would have told her she was asking the same thing of me and quite frankly she should do a bit more research on what she wants before asking for something that is impossible to do - the laws of nature being what they are and all.....

You see this is why I work for myself....you can imagine the problems I've had with bosses who don't have a clue!! Yes I should learn to curb my responses, but ignorance mixed with confidence is a real PITA.


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## Aline (Aug 23, 2014)

O M G! I don't know if I could have responded that politely  I would have definitely had to have a stomping throwing my hands up in the air yelling session first....!

I guess it's people like this that spread misinformation:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=z65OuuVVj-4


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## whiskandbowl (Aug 23, 2014)

LOL I would have told them to mix oil and water, stir and see what happens. That's what happens when you try to make soap without lye


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## DeeAnna (Aug 23, 2014)

I do a lot of custom work (not soap or B&B) and get a few people like this every year. There are just some people who live on another planet and there's no talking them into reason. The best solution is to politely but firmly decline to work for them, just as Merryn did so nicely, and courteously end the conversation as quickly as possible. I'm not getting paid to be their therapist or guru, so the faster I can figure out the other person is not of this Earth, the better. Then I can get on with my day and hopefully talk to other people who have their feet on the same planet I do. Not sayin' I'm perfect at this, but it's my goal.

One of the nicest things about being a small biz owner is that I don't have to work for every person who walks in the door. ;-)

Well done, Merryn!


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## pamielynn (Aug 24, 2014)

Ugh, I've never been in that exact situation(about the lye), but have been asked to make baby/wedding shower soaps on a couple of occasions, and they want MP-type stuff in a "week or so". When I try to explain why I can't do that, they never really understand - and don't really care to.

What I did was to find a good MP'er that is local to me and now I refer all those requests to her. It just isn't worth your breath (or typing time) sometimes 

And, I agree, kudos for keeping your cool!


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## Kyra (Aug 24, 2014)

OMG! Congratulations on keeping your calm and diplomacy. Because of a few similar incidents I now deny from the start any request for custom work. I just don't bother, I am busy enough without all the headache of trying to please somebody with too many special requests, especially when they don't have a clue about what they are really asking. These are my products - you want them? Add them to cart! You want something else? Keep on using google! LOOOL


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## Ellacho (Aug 24, 2014)

_Them - "Maybe you don't know how to make soap if you can't make it without lye".
_

OMG!!!  I am speechless!


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## Dorymae (Aug 24, 2014)

Ellacho said:


> _Them - "Maybe you don't know how to make soap if you can't make it without lye".
> _
> 
> OMG!!!  I am speechless!




Pfft...should have said, " Maybe you don't know how to think since a lightbulb doesn't appear over your head " ..... people can really be something huh!


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## lambsgrovegirl (Aug 24, 2014)

Oh my gosh....you would have had nothing but headaches if you had worked with this person! Consider yourself lucky to figure out early that their chain is slipping!


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## LunaSkye (Aug 25, 2014)

I have no idea how you managed to stay calm, but good for you! 

My patience with people is slowly going down the drain (if it did not already evaporate into thin air) and she would have caught a nice snark out of me.


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## The Efficacious Gentleman (Aug 25, 2014)

If they want soap that never had lye in the supply chain, they should contact these wizards from Etsy.......................!

Shocking scenes.


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## shunt2011 (Aug 25, 2014)

I am impressed with your diplomacy in dealing with stupid and rude.  You would think that if they are thinking of selling something they would at least checked out the process and what it entailed.  I'm sure they would have been a royal pain if you ended up working with them.


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## bodybym (Aug 25, 2014)

The Efficacious Gentleman said:


> If they want soap that never had lye in the supply chain, they should contact these wizards from Etsy.......................!
> 
> Shocking scenes.



I should have suggested that! No, I wouldn't wish these people on anyone. I feel sorry for whoever the get to make their soaps.


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## dixiedragon (Aug 25, 2014)

In a way, I can't blame them. There is so much misinformation out there. I think of the "natural" Zum soaps at Whole foods. Not sure where in nature you get Dragonblood scent. And not sure how you get the powerful Almond and Coffee scents in those bars naturally.


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## DeeAnna (Aug 26, 2014)

Actually dragonsblood is found in nature -- it's a resin collected from several types of plants. But I really do get your point!


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## KatieShephard (Aug 26, 2014)

Consider yourself lucky that you were exposed to the crazy before it was too late!  And good for you for keeping your cool...not many people have that kind of grace.  What a loonball!


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## SoapWorks (Sep 10, 2014)

If you said that you could make soap without using Lye, you would be lying.*

* Yes, I think this is really punny!


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## goji_fries (Sep 10, 2014)

bodybym said:


> I then politely said that I don't believe that we would be good business partners as we seem to have a different vision of what the product should be, and that I wish them well in finding someone who will help them to make the soap that they want.
> 
> Good luck to them.



You handled that one with class. :clap:


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## CiCi (Sep 16, 2014)

Wow...I'm at a loss for words. You handled it perfectly.


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## Aki_onlineboutiquesource (Sep 17, 2014)

Great response, some people will never understand the process. It's better just to walk away then to try to explain it all to them


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## KatsKreations (Sep 17, 2014)

Looks like you dodged a bullet on that one. Good for you for saying no.. husband and I own a construction company and some people are way out of touch with reality.


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