# my mom died suddenly this morning



## Woodi (Mar 20, 2011)

She turned 84 this February, had been in a nursing home for 5 years after a stroke (following a heart attack and triple bypass surgery). Her personality changed 180 degrees following the stroke, as she lost her speech, and all she could say was "Beautiful, beautiful", "such a pretty!" and a few other positive words of love to everyone she met.

but the call at 4AM this morning was a shock. She had been in such high spirits for the past two weeks, and I was looking forward to visiting her today.

My Dad (now 85) lives in an attached 'retirement lodge' to this nursing care home. He will suffer tremendously without her by his side. They spent every waking minute together, made everyone at the home laugh and smile.

He put her to bed all cheery last night after their usual TV show (Jeopardy) and some puzzles they worked on together. But she wasn't well this morning at 4AM, buzzed for a nurse, and went into a coma very quickly. Dad held her hand while she took her last breath. If you care to, please hold him in your heart while he goes through his grief.

I spent the day with Dad, my brother and his wife, and my hubby. Not a tear have I shed yet. I feel numb and maybe in shock. Like there is a big cement rock in my chest. Strange. The world doesn't feel or look the same without my mother in it. She was always the strong one of us all.

What wierd feelings are going through me ..... I can't breathe; head hurts; heart is heavy. Will I ever be happy again?


----------



## agriffin (Mar 20, 2011)

Oh Diane, I'm so sorry.  I'm going to bed right now and will add you and your family to my prayers.  

I can't imagine loosing my Mom.


----------



## tomara (Mar 20, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss for you and your family.


----------



## Deda (Mar 20, 2011)

Oh, Dear Diane, I'm so sorry.  Your words bring tears to my eyes.  I'll pray for your dad, you and the rest of your family.


----------



## Sibi (Mar 20, 2011)

Diane,

I am truly sorry for your great loss.  Your mother sounds like she was a lovely person and I'm sure she will be missed greatly.  Keep her memory close to your heart and count yourself blessed to have had such a wonderful mom.  She will surely be watching you from above in a beautiful place.  I will keep you and your family in my prayers,

Sibi


----------



## Hazel (Mar 20, 2011)

Diane,

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss. I agree with what Sibi said about you being blessed to have had such a wonderful mother. I know it's extremely hard for you right now and I wish I could offer some words of comfort to help you. Blessings to you and your family during such a difficult and sad time.


----------



## Lynnz (Mar 21, 2011)

Diane I send you a cyber hug and hold you in my thoughts at this time.


----------



## IrishLass (Mar 21, 2011)

Dear Diane,

My heart just goes out to you and your father and the rest of your family. It's never, ever easy losing loved ones (I lost my dad, mom, stepdad, stepmom and grandma all within the past 8 years). The hardest deaths for me to deal with were my mom and dad because they both died unexpectedly without any loved ones by their side when it happened. I'm _so_ glad your dad was there with your mom when she took her last breath. It's one of the worst feelings in the world to know a dear loved one was without a hand to hold when they beathed their last. I know only too well the feeling that it doesn't seem possible right now that you'll ever smile again, but it will happen in time. I will be keeping you and your dad in my prayers.

(((((hugs))))))
IrishLass


----------



## soapbuddy (Mar 21, 2011)

I'm so sorry for your loss. Please accept my condolences.


----------



## BakingNana (Mar 21, 2011)

Diane, I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved mother.  I lost mine 9 years ago, and yes...you will be happy again, but not entirely without the ache I'm afraid.  Please know that we are holding you and your family in our prayers.  Also sending ((((((hugs))))))).


----------



## nattynoo (Mar 21, 2011)

I'm so sorry for your loss.
Will be thinking of you and your family.
Please take care of yourself.


----------



## Relle (Mar 21, 2011)

Thinking of you at this sad time.


----------



## Traceyann (Mar 21, 2011)

Thinking of you Dianne, I lost my mum way to early she was only 59 so I fully understand how you feel, My thoughts and prayers are with you all....

I still miss my mum 4 yrs on xx


----------



## dagmar88 (Mar 21, 2011)

I'm sorry for the loss of you and your family. I can only imagine how hard this would be for your dad   

However, your mother died feeling loved, with her husband by her side, and that's a beautiful thing.


----------



## Dragonkaz (Mar 21, 2011)

Diane I'm so sorry that you and your loved ones are grieving for your Mum, but what wonderful memories you all have and this will support your Dad and help you all during the hours, weeks, months ahead!

Sending Kiwi Hugs to you, your Dad and your family!


----------



## Woodi (Mar 21, 2011)

Thank you everyone. It does ease the pain to hear from you all.

Today we go to the funeral parlor to discuss procedures. A snow storm is upon us at the moment - pretty, large white flakes thickening the skies.


----------



## Bubbly Buddha (Mar 21, 2011)

Thinking of you and your family in this difficult time...


----------



## carebear (Mar 21, 2011)

Oh geez, Diane. I'm so sorry.  My heart is with you and your family.


----------



## tisci (Mar 21, 2011)

I am sooo sorry! That is so incredibly sad.


----------



## heyjude (Mar 21, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss, Diane. I went through the death of my dh's parents and while neither were totally  unexpected, you can never truly know how you will feel until it happens. My thoughts are with you.

Hugs to you and your Dad.


----------



## maya (Mar 21, 2011)

i am so very sorry for your loss.


----------



## NancyRogers (Mar 21, 2011)

I'm so sorry for your loss.  We also lost a loved one this weekend.  My dear FIL passed away on Saturday.  It's never easy on those of us who are left, but I do believe that those who have gone on are in a wonderful and happy place free of the pain and disabilities that held them back during their living years.  My FIL suffered so much and for so long before his passing, that I remind myself he is okay now.  Please know that I am thinking of you and your family during this time.


----------



## ChrissyB (Mar 21, 2011)

I just read this, Diane, I'm so sorry.
For some reason we tend to think of our parents as infallible. It breaks our hearts when we learn that isn't true. Your mum sounds like she was a wonderful woman,and I am holding you and your father in my thoughts whilst you go through this terrible time.
Yes, you willl be happy again, your mum would want you to be happy.
Hugs xx


----------



## dandelion (Mar 22, 2011)

so sorry for your loss, will keep you and your family in prayer


----------



## dubnica (Mar 22, 2011)

I am sorry for your loss. 
In time you will be able to think about her life, not her death.


----------



## Bubbles Galore (Mar 22, 2011)

I'm very sorry Diane. This is one of the most difficult times of life. Your lovely mother is without limitation now so please take comfort. Hugs.


----------



## Sunny (Mar 23, 2011)

I'm so sorry. I'm thinking about your dad with tears in my eyes. It sounds like they had a wonderful life together and I'm so happy for that. How fortunate that you are so close to your parents! Her love will always be with you.


----------



## Woodi (Mar 23, 2011)

Thanks again everyone!

I had no idea how much work it is to prepare for a funeral. I am documenting the process for friends. I LOVE the funeral director we chose: a small family-operated business for 3 generations now. So kind and considerate.

I finally wrote my eulogy, (took 4 attempts); not sure if I will be able to read it out without breaking up, but my son and daughter will be there to help tomorrow.

My brother asked for Josh Groban's "To Where you are" to be played.....yikes, there won't be a dry eye all day. (but that's a good thing).


----------



## kelleyaynn (Mar 23, 2011)

So sorry to hear about your loss.  It is never easy.  Take care of yourself as you go through all this.


----------



## lauramw71 (Mar 25, 2011)

Oh, I am so, so, sorry for your loss.  *hugs*


----------



## ToniD (Mar 25, 2011)

I am very sorry for your loss.   May the Lord give you and your Dad strength and comfort  as you walk through this time of grief.


----------



## mariflo (Mar 27, 2011)

I am so very sorry for your loss Diane.


----------



## ewenique (Mar 29, 2011)

Thinking of you during this sad time.  We were in Ontario last month to bury my father-in-law who also died suddenly.  Take time to grieve and keep her memory close in your heart.


----------

