"...should I up the citric acid until I get to the stage of no droplets on the dishes?..."
Even a whole house water softener can't remove all the hard water minerals in water. It is totally unrealistic to expect a tiny bit of chelator in a bar of soap or in a squirt of liquid soap to solve the problem, especially when you're talking about treating water used to wash dishes and clothes.
On top of that, there are consequences to the quality of the soap if you try to load it with an excess of an additive like this. At about 3% citric acid or more, the soap will begin to feel rubbery and citrate salt crystals will form a white efflorescence on the surface of the soap.
"...Will it be harsh on the hands... If I then use this soap in softer water, will there be a problem? Will this feel stripping?..."
I use EDTA, not citrate, but I've not noticed anything like that. You seem to be thinking the use of a chelator will affect the mildness or harshness of the soap itself. You need to look at your basic soap recipe for whether the soap will be harsh to the skin or not. A harsh soap will be harsh whether you use it in hard water or soft. A gentle soap will be gentle regardless of the water.
Even a whole house water softener can't remove all the hard water minerals in water. It is totally unrealistic to expect a tiny bit of chelator in a bar of soap or in a squirt of liquid soap to solve the problem, especially when you're talking about treating water used to wash dishes and clothes.
On top of that, there are consequences to the quality of the soap if you try to load it with an excess of an additive like this. At about 3% citric acid or more, the soap will begin to feel rubbery and citrate salt crystals will form a white efflorescence on the surface of the soap.
"...Will it be harsh on the hands... If I then use this soap in softer water, will there be a problem? Will this feel stripping?..."
I use EDTA, not citrate, but I've not noticed anything like that. You seem to be thinking the use of a chelator will affect the mildness or harshness of the soap itself. You need to look at your basic soap recipe for whether the soap will be harsh to the skin or not. A harsh soap will be harsh whether you use it in hard water or soft. A gentle soap will be gentle regardless of the water.