In the midst of this pandemic, my eldest son is so isolated, it worries me greatly. None of the family has been able to visit him, nor has he been able to visit any of us either due to distance, travel restrictions, financial circumstances, medical circumstances, wildfires and so forth. On top of that, his landlord wants all tenants out of the property (a few tiny houses she rents to HUD recipients) and began a campaign to force them all out perhaps before the pandemic, or just as the pandemic hit; timing could simply be a co-incidence. But whether it just happens to be a co-incidence that she started this in the Spring, or not, she attempted to evict all tenants from all units after the pandemic began to rage here in the US. Luckily because there is a moratorium on evictions right now, his housing situation is safe for a bit. And lucky for the landlord, HUD recipients are required to pay their portion of the rent or HUD will drop them, so the rent does get paid.
She's better off than my younger son, whose tenant didn't pay rent for 6 months and her excuse was 'you can't kick me out because of CoVid' & the moratorium on evictions. So they can't pay the mortgage on their house which is now up for sale. He'd be better off if he had set up renting to HUD recipients.
But back to my eldest son, who is so isolated and I am really worried about. This year I do not want to put my health at risk by traveling to California, and I have explained that to him. It gives me so much guilt considering that I have always gone to visit him at least once per year for the past several years, and he needs me or someone, but no, it's me he needs and it is so hard to communicate with him by phone. His speech is hard to understand on the phone, often his speech is pressured, especially lately. Getting him to slow down, enunciate and speak clearly is nearly impossible. And my hearing loss makes it even more difficult. Face to face, I can usually calm him and we can communicate better, but on the phone it's very difficult and I am sure just as frustrating to him as it is for me.
So here's the deal for my little family...
Younger son & DIL are trying to sell the house here in town that they used to live in before moving to Texas; they have not been able to keep up with the mortgage payments because they didn't have the income (not just CoVid related - deadbeat tenant related, but exacerbated by CoVid pandemic); the back has turned the mortgage over to collections (I just learned this last week). Older son will need to find a new place to live soon if the eviction moratorium is lifted; he has HUD but even so, finding a new place will be difficult; his car needs work again; he lives on his disability payments, so income is limited; he cannot work, cannot hold a job when he tries; he needs mental health support, which is sporadic for a variety of reasons, some internal and some external; Our mortgage is paid off; Hubby has job security with a steady income (except in the case of a government shut-down, then his departments has always had to work without pay); my income is steady (2 retirements + Social Security); we can afford to buy younger son's house so they don't have to go bankrupt and destroy their credit; we can provide eldest son a home, which we believe we can get HUD approved.
So Hubby & I are working on a plan to buy the house, get it ready for him and his dog; we have to install a fence for the backyard; get him a washer & dryer; perhaps upgrade the bathroom (for his handicap). I actually thought he might balk at the idea, but he has warmed up to it a lot in terms of the long-haul, as it is single story and a nice location in town and he wants us to retire to a single story home in future, and although he wanted to move to another state, I really like it here and sees real potential with this as our retirement home if eldest son decides he can't live in the MidWest (we did try it once before, and he didn't take to it, but that was in the same house as us; this might actually be better for him as he doesn't live well with others.)
DIL is highly family support oriented, so she loves the idea of selling to us to provide a home for her brother-in-law, and believes younger son will feel the same way because he feels guilt sometimes that he can't help his brother or stand to be around him for prolonged periods when he tries. And Hubby is very considerate in that he wants to help younger son & DIL out financially in such a way that we don't take unfair advantage of their financial straights and offer a fair price for the house rather than gouge them like the last buyers tried to do. I am extremely proud of my husband's ethics and wish my Dad were still alive to see this, because he would have been so proud of my husband as well.
In any case, this pandemic (SARS Co-V-2) has certainly exacerbated this entire situation for us, but also for untold numbers of others in similar situations around the nation, and I expect, the entire world.