Big Rant...sister

[cmzaha]

My racks and crates are almost empty and I cannot get the time or desire to make any. In case any asks, there is much worse than being an only child, and I wish I was one.

I know most of you know my sister alternated taking care of our parents, since my step-dad passes away things have gone downhill quickly. She came in 2 weeks ago and started manipulated my mother into evicting my disabled daughter and her family after 13 yrs. The agreement with my parents was my daughter would never have to pay rent or never not have a place to live. The kids would try to pay rent and they would not take it. Before all this my sister was given 100k for a new house which she ultimately had to short sale, resulting in more given thousands to buy another house, which she once again cannot afford.

What is really bad is she is coming down from Oxycodone after 14 yrs of 5 per day and has become very mean. Which of course she does not recognize and her Katom is not helping her much. So I have been accused of stealing 150k plus 10's of thousands of dollars, so she had my mom sign at the bank to kill my POA which the bank had. I talked to one of the bank officers after I was taken of the POA and they recommended I move the bulk of the cash into another trust account if she has one so I did. Since father died my mom has started deteriorating quickly, and has quite bad dementia for the last year or so, of course my sister denies it. Since she does not seem to know my POA is still in effect I am going to try to have my mom tested. She has to be the stupidest person around that holds a Masters in education. She is also is to dumb to know that no changes can be made to the trust at this point and I have hired an attorney. Biggest problem that I accidently left my copy of the trust at my moms and need to retrieve it. Trying that tomorrow, since the attorney was to go over it and see if she can use my moms money to fight a lawsuit. I have Adult Protective Serves on her and the police have been doing daily wellness checks on my mom. This is driving her nuts!!

Sorry everyone just had to get some of this off my chest. If anyone notices snippy answers to posts you know why, I do not mean to but my frame of mind is not good at the moment

 

[msunnerstood]

Im so sorry you are going through this. Ive been there with my brother. Hang in there and stay strong!

 

[Meena]

Oh cmzaha, this is all very dreadful and awful, I'm so sorry this all is happening , between your mom, daughter, and sister it's too much for anyone to go through!!! Fights over money are the worst, and a deal's a deal where I come from, so I hope your lawyer will be able to stop the eviction from happening. Keep us posted. Sending you Love and blessings, dear.

 

[cmzaha]

Thankyou both, they are preparing to move and I am worried about the altitude which is 4800 feet. My daughter has epilepsy, rheumatoid arthritis, 2 other autoimmune problems and some type of dysplasia that can cause a brain aneurysm. Not sure why she ended up so ill in her life and my conniving, greedy, jealous sister thinks it is funny to evict them.
She is hoping she is going to get the entire inheritance. Thank goodness my husband and I have our own money to live on, not rich but I pay the bills. She has no savings at all

 

[Cherrydene soapy]

I hope you are taking care of yourself, you need to be strong and resilient for what is ahead of you. xx

 

[shunt2011]

Carolyn, I am so very sorry you are going through this. I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers for some peace and resolution. Sometimes family sucks.

 

[Clarice]

Carolyn, I am so sorry this is happening to you. I can hear your pain in your words. Sending you lots of virtual hugs and strength. I hope this resolves in a way that is safe for you and your daughter. Be well. Stay strong. Know that there are hundreds (probably thousands!) of soapers sending you strength and love!

 

[cmzaha]

Thankyou Shari and Clarice.

Time will tell. My husband and I are thinking about going over tonight to moms with our bags and tell my sister we are moving in. She needs to return to Arizona and swim in her own mess.

 

[Rogue-Soaper]

I am so sorry to hear that this is happening to you.

 

[zanzalawi]

this is one of my biggest fears, i've seen it played out so many times. one sibling goes rogue and seems hellbent on destruction
as my parents start to get older, they've been trying to set up things to make it easier for us in the future, with POA and the wills and what not, but they cant idiot-proof us from ourselves. its my baby sister i worry about most.
same with my inlaws. my sister in law can be a wicked little thing but if there is money around- the step-siblings will be ready for battle.
i like the idea of "moving in" it might just turn her insane enough that she'll take off. and not much she can do behind your back if you're right there. that is an awful lot of stress for you and your family. take the best care of you that you can, you will need your strength and your wits.
i hope it comes to a swift and peaceful resolution

 

[Lin19687]

HUGS !

 

[dibbles]

So, so sorry Carolyn. You've had so much to deal with, and now this. Hugs to you.

 

[cmzaha]

Thank you all for the good thoughts, it really does help.

Half Sister told me I have a black heart and need to be in a mental institution.


What she is so ignorant about is, the house is not considered habitable and could garner my mom big fines and or jail time. But she has a Master's degree... Mom is good at throwing that up to me. Just because she never accepted rent from the kids does not mean you can supply them with an uninhabitable house to live in.

 

[IrishLass]

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, Carolyn.....and for your daughter and her family to be evicted! How terrible! We have something different, but similar happening in my own family with a trouble-making sibling. Sometimes it feels like we're living in a soap opera with all the drama he's caused to his own wife and children. His illogical, self-centeredned behavior is very maddening to say the least.

You and your family are in my prayers!

I hope you and your hubby make a show of moving in! That sounds like a grand idea to me. Your mom needs protection from the vulture-like behavior of your sister.


IrishLass

 

[penelopejane]

Thinking of you Carolyn and hoping the situation finally gets resolved happily. What a nightmare for you to struggle through.

 

[jcandleattic]

I'm so sorry this is happening to you. We have had similar (but not exact) situations in my family, and I have a feeling when the time comes with my parents, I will also most likely be dealing with a vindictive, over-reaching sibling.

I do hope everything works out as best as possible for you, your mom and your daughters family. And most of all, I hope you are taking care of yourself in the meantime.

 

[Marilyn Norgart]

I am so sorry you are going thru this--I stay away from my family due to the underhanded things they have pulled and then turned around and blamed me and tried to dirty my name. both my parents are gone so its easier to distance myself. fortunately I have learned along time ago blood really isn't thicker than water. and I have family that isn't blood--life is too short to let users and abusers do that to you. I hope things work out as best as possible for you. and just keep telling yourself you deserve better and don't put up with anybodies crap!!!

 

[lenarenee]

Carolyn wasn't it in CA that a live-in nanny was fired from her job, but since she had lived there a few months and had, in legal terms, "established residence", wasn't able to be evicted without a long, arduous legal process? You said you hired a lawyer - this may be a way to delay the eviction process as you work to gain control of the situation.

There are no words for this situation. I'm so sorry you've gone from one challenge to another.

 

[cmzaha]

Carolyn wasn't it in CA that a live-in nanny was fired from her job, but since she had lived there a few months and had, in legal terms, "established residence", wasn't able to be evicted without a long, arduous legal process? You said you hired a lawyer - this may be a way to delay the eviction process as you work to gain control of the situation.

There are no words for this situation. I'm so sorry you've gone from one challenge to another.

I think it was.

I can get it delayed, because the house is not habitable, they have put up with the problems, such as leaking sewer under the house because my parents would not take the rent money. Problem is, if we call out a building inspector I know what will happen, they will go after my mom. I do not want that to happen.

My sister's violence is escalating, she me attacked me today trying to take away a paper my mom was signing to revoke the eviction, or at the least re-assess it at the end of the year. She actually pushed me over the tv tray my mom was using into her lap. What a mess

 

[Marilyn Norgart]

I think it was.

I can get it delayed, because the house is not habitable, they have put up with the problems, such as leaking sewer under the house because my parents would not take the rent money. Problem is, if we call out a building inspector I know what will happen, they will go after my mom. I do not want that to happen.

My sister's violence is escalating, she me attacked me today trying to take away a paper my mom was signing to revoke the eviction, or at the least re-assess it at the end of the year. She actually pushed me over the tv tray my mom was using into her lap. What a mess

do you wonder if she is being violent with your mom?